Cabo! Cabo! Cabo!

Here it is, almost 11 p.m., and Ihave to be up at 3 a.m. How stupid am I? I just finished all the last minute packing and think I have everything I need for the trip! I am about ready to drop but my mind is still racing. You know how it is ... did I get that ... don't forget this.

Anyway, I need to get some sleep now. Have a fabulous 4th!!

I Usually Enjoy It! What Happened?

I thought I would treat myself to a pedicure today so my feet would look pretty on my mini vacation and, OMG!!, it was the most torture my toes have ever been through. Usually a pedicure takes what, an hour? I was in that chair for 2 and the stupid massagers on the chair wouldn't stop. By the end of it, my brain was rattling around inside my head so badly, I'm sure I'm bleeding to death internally as I type this!

On top of that, the lady cut one of my toes wide open so blood was gushing down my foot. All right, it wasn't really gushing but it hurt! She also splashed water up onto the chair so I had to sit there with my skirt dripping wet and when I stood up, it looked like I tinkled on myself and, to top it off, I tried a French Manicure on my toes. Well it looks like a blind monkey went to town on my feet. The lines are all crooked and look really weird. I'm just going to pretend that it's a fashion statement and that geometric patterns on your feet are the hip thing. What else can I do?

I guess I could re-paint them myself but even though I'm done with physical therapy, I still can't bend over for any length of time so they'd probably look worse and the last time my boy painted my toenails for me, he made me prop my feet on a box and he pulled a magnifying light over them so he could see. It was a very long process and he did a fabulous job but I don't see him going for that tonight.

On a more positive note, I leave for Cabo in 2 days!! I can't wait.

Happy Monday!

Calgon Take Me Away!

I am restless and really irritable today. My boy was off working with my aunt and I had the house all to myslef, which I normally love. I tried to dive into a book, didn't work, totally unusual, so I cleaned the kitchen, did the laundry, and picked up everything. It needed to be done before we leave on Thursday anyway. I still couldn't seem to gain any sort of calm in my mind so I decided to go shopping. Nothing like a new pair of shoes to make a gal happy!

I did get a new pair of shoes and a bunch of little travel sized things to take on our mini-trip, seemed like a good idea at the time until I got to the register and spent $142.00. Stupid, stupid, stupid!! And then, my boy complained that he didn't like the sunscreen I bought ... too high of an SPF. I told him to use freaking baby oil and leave me alone. Ummm ... yeah ... that was a little rude of me.

I think I'll take a muscle relaxer and go to sleep so I don't dream about roaches! See, I told you I needed a vacation.

Is Someone Trying to Tell Me Something?

So, I get a taco salad for lunch and when I open the box at my desk a roach crawls out. I am not kidding ... a freaking roach comes strolling out like he's a little old lady at a crosswalk ... taking his time, checking everything out. Do you think this is God's way of telling me that I should no longer eat fast food?

I know it isn't nice to say that you hate things but I hate roaches. Let me say that again ... I HATE ROACHES! They are disgusting, vile little creatures that completely make me all ooky inside. At Six Flags, roaches are everywhere and they are HUGE! When you turn on the lights, they don't run away. Oooooh no, they charge you. They try to attack and carry you off to roachland! I will never forget the time I went to put on my wig and one of the d*mn things was inside there and crawled around on my head. AHHHHHHH! So nasty!!

My castmates thought it would be fun to mess with me so they bought a giant plastic roach and named it Precious. They even put blue eye-shadow on it so it would look "pretty." Precious would turn up everywhere ... in my shoes, in my costumes, in my wigs ... everywhere. The last straw was when I walked into the dressing room and there was Precious surrounded by 20 honest to goodness dead roaches. "Hey look, Angela. Precious is having a party!"

Nobody picked the grotesque things up for a week. Ugh ... It still makes me squeamish to think about it so you can imagine my horror when one crawled out of my lunch!

You can bet that my taco salad days are OVER. I just wish that I didn't still have the image of that thing seared into my brain!!

Have a good night!

What the Heck Does that Mean Anyway?!

So, someone said something really strange to me at work and I'm not really sure how to take it. Background, I used to do a lot of theater ... shows at Six Flags for years and stuff locally. Tons of make-up, false eyelashes, three inch dance shoes, and perfect hair were a daily thing for me. I've slowed down a lot in the past couple of years so to my "real" job, I wear khakis and braid my hair and I don't put a bunch of stuff on my face.

A couple of weeks ago, after selling the nightmare rental house, I decided to treat myself to a couple of cute skirts for work. When you dress a little nicer, you expect comments like, "You look pretty today," or "That's a cute outfit." You don't expect almost every person, and I'm not stretching the truth here, to point out how much you've changed. (People not in my department that I've never spoken to made comments about my appearance.) I got things like, "I didn't know you were so pretty," and "Wow! You actually have legs," and "You don't even look like the same person," and, my personal favorite, "You clean up well. I am so proud of you!"

What the heck does that mean? I am proud of you?!! Huh? I didn't realize that I was making my co-workers eyes bleed when they had to pass me in the hall!

I called one of my best friends and told her that I can't believe she didn't tell me I was scaring small children on a daily basis. Apparently, I am the stuff nightmares are made of. I am the reason that your kids wake up in the middle of the night screaming!

I know that people probably thought they were being nice but, come on!! Am I wrong to be so irritated?

I think in rebellion I am going to sew a couple of tablecloths together and wear homemade mumus (sp) for the rest of the year!

Don't Waste the Junk Food

Sorry, it's been a while but it has been an exhausting couple of weeks. First, my boy and I floated the river ... second, we went to his sister's wedding last weekend ... third, work is kicking my behind. I seriously need a relaxing vacation!

The wedding was fun. She was beautiful ... is there ever an ugly bride? His family actually started in on the marriage issue with my boy and I. I was completely thrown because they have never pressured us before. His mother offered my boy the wedding ring that his father had given her so he could have it re-set to give to me. We immediately began telling everyone that we were both gay and just a cover for each other. That momentarily stopped the talk but then the grandparents started in. It was grueling! By the end of the reception, I was slamming down drinks so fast you would have thought prohibition was kicking in the next day!

After the reception, we headed back to the hotel and up to his father's suite. Once there, we had the expected bubbly toasts and quite a bit of wine. As we headed back to our room, not a suite, we passed by a room that wasn't latched all the way shut. We had heard some serious partying coming out of that room earlier so thought maybe the people had passed out and not shut their door all the way. After finding a luggage cart to race around the floor on for a few minutes, I became obsessed with the idea that I really needed to throw Chex Mix on the sleeping drunk people. We got our stash of junk food and headed back down the hall. My boy and I popped open the door and began throwing the Chex Mix onto where we assumed the bed to be but when there was no reaction, we flipped on the light and discovered we were wasting our snacks on an empty conference room. I was bummed until we figured out how much fun it would be to see if I could fit into the built in drawers of the closet ... I can't!

The moral of this story ... if you've had too much to drink, go straight back to your room and DON'T waste your junkfood. You'll want it later!!

Happy Monday!